


Only In Dreams

by TheSpasticFantastic



Series: When All Is Lost [14]
Category: Frozen (Disney Movies), Frozen - Fandom
Genre: Angst, F/M, PWP, So the argument could be that this advances the greater plot, but it's part of a series
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-08
Updated: 2020-06-19
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:27:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,262
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24614491
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheSpasticFantastic/pseuds/TheSpasticFantastic
Summary: Still unable to make their feelings towards one another known, Agnarr and Iduna have to deal with the consequences of their repressed affection.
Relationships: Agnarr & Iduna (Disney), Agnarr/Iduna (Disney)
Series: When All Is Lost [14]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1571230
Comments: 21
Kudos: 25





	1. Agnarr

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: This is all Fericita's fault. I can not emphasize enough how much this is entirely her fault. It was her idea. SHE KNEW. SHE KNEW WHAT SHE WAS DOING.

Agnarr wasn’t entirely certain how they had ended up in his bed. The question passed fleetingly through his mind before more pressing matters occupied his thoughts. Like Iduna’s hands sliding under his jacket where it hung unbuttoned, small and warm against the thin material of his shirt. Or how pliant her mouth was against his as he shifted his weight so he wouldn’t crush her. The way her waist and hip fit into his hand exactly as it had during their all-too brief dance at his birthday celebration.

He felt drunk on the taste of her as he let her shove the jacket over his shoulders. Her clever fingers making quick work of his shirt buttons as she smiled up at him and then he was bare chested before her. His mouth latched on to the juncture of her jaw and neck and he felt her gasp against him. Somehow, she managed to slip out of her dress while beneath him and he could feel the searing heat of her skin against his own.

Every uncertainty he had felt about her affections for him, every doubt about his ability to make plain his intentions and interest towards her, every pang of guilt that had plagued him when he thought about Iduna in ways Captain Calder would charitably classify as ‘unbecoming a young gentleman’ were burned to ash as her body roiled against him. So intense and overwhelming was his lust and luck that Agnarr completely lost himself in the darkness of the bedcovers as he moved within her.

She clung to him. Hands on his shoulders, in his hair, slipping along his back where the sweat was to slick for her to grip. All the things he had never been able to convey through his clumsy words came out in the unspoken staccato of their coupling. It was almost as though it was better than he could have ever hoped that it would be and certainly better than he deserved.

He held her after they finished. Stroking her wild hair and caressing her face. He still could hardly believe his good fortune.

“I can’t believe this happened,” he murmured. “I can’t believe you’re here.”

“Of course I’m here.” She replied, her eyes dimming and expression suddenly inscrutable. “I have to be. You’re the king.”

* * * * *

Agnarr startled awake, his arms thrusting to either side of him in the wide, empty bed.

“Fuck,” he mumbled as he sat up and blearily rubbed his eyes. The familiar sense of restless frustration and the ache that had been plaguing him for several months were all too acute at this early hour. He crawled out from under the covers. A cold morning bath would sort it out.

The dreams were becoming more persistent. And more illicit.

He had engaged in a very awkward and very embarrassing conversation with the Royal Physician a few years earlier. Wagner had assured him that such longings and nocturnal stirrings were not only normal, but a sign of good health in a young man. Agnarr had never broached the topic again. Henrik had mentioned proudly, several times, that he didn’t have such dreams given his prolific nocturnal activities. And while Agnarr had exchanged glances with Elias that made him suspect that his friend, at least, understood, they had never spoken of it.

It wasn’t Iduna’s fault that he kept having these damned dreams. It wasn’t. Unlike most of the young women who he was required to entertain for diplomatic purposes, Iduna never gave herself airs or made eyes at him or engaged in banter that could be construed as risqué. Even if he wished that she would give him a sign, any sign, of how she felt about him. 

He felt like a lecher when he saw her after such episodes. It wasn’t appropriate for him to think of her in such ways. Naked, to start with. Christ, if she ever found out he would be lucky if she ever spoke to him again. Or worse . . .would she feel obligated to bed him as she had in his dream? Iduna was his subject even if they only ever addressed that fact in jest. She was on his Royal Council. Beholden to his will. He had always tried to be careful not to press himself upon her for that very reason.

Agnarr sighed and dunked himself under the surface of the freezing water.

* * * * *

She had come to him this time.

He had been riding in the woods, far from the usual places she sought out the roots and barks, the leaves and berries with which she seemingly worked magic. She found him out on a lonely trail along the coast that led to a long-neglected Royal Hunting Lodge from his grandfather’s time and led him on a merry chase.

Agnarr didn’t wonder where she had gotten the horse. He didn’t wonder how she was able to undress him so quickly. He didn’t wonder at their awkwardness given their inexperience. He didn’t wonder at her persistence in pushing him down against the mattress. Her mouth was a brand against his neck, her nails left proof of her possession of him raised in crimson along his ribs. 

Iduna worked him relentlessly, demanding to know what he liked and what he didn’t like. He swore he liked it all. All of it. Every moment she graced him with the bliss of her being. The wordless confirmation that she loved him, accepted him, wanted him in the same way that he had wanted her for so long. She had merely laughed, tapped his nose, and asked what he had liked _best_. And then she had done it again. And again.

And finally – finally, when he was entirely spent with nothing left to give, she had sprawled against him, her head on his chest. He rested his hand on her back as she kissed his collarbone, feeling the uneven pant of her breath against his damp skin. Tangled in the blankets with her against him, enshrined in her warmth, he couldn’t recall ever experiencing such a sense of peace.

“Thank you,” she whispered. And before he could correct her, to thank her for fulfilling his deepest desires, to ask her to be his, she continued. “Henrik has asked to court me and I don’t want to come across as inexperienced.”

* * * * *

“Why do you keep looking at me, Ag?” Henrik asked before taking a puff from his pipe.

“What do you mean?”

“You keep staring at me.”

“You do keep staring at him, Agnarr.” Elias laughed as he took his rook. “What did you do Henrik?”

“Ha. My mother tries to squeeze confessions from me with that very line and it doesn’t work for her either.” Henrik wagged his finger and then glanced at his pocket watch. “Well, gentlemen, I must be off.”

“Who is she?” Agnarr demanded. Elias frowned and now it was Henrik’s turn to stare.

“No one you know.” He replied cautiously. “Nothing that will cause an international incident. Are you sure you’re alright, Ag?”

Agnarr frowned and rubbed his face. “I’m sorry. It’s none of my business. Enjoy your evening, Henrik.” He focused on the chess board and pretended not to notice as Henrik and Elias exchanged a glance before Henrik bowed and took his leave.

“How are things going with Thea?” He asked Elias after a few minutes. Elias chuckled and clapped him on the arm.

“Well. They’re going well. Really well.” He sighed happily. “She’s wonderful.” Elias leaned forward and knocked one of his pawns off the board. “How are things going for you? With your many, many courtships?”

“I’m not courting anyone, Elias.”

“You know what I mean.” Agnarr hesitated, his hand hovering above the board, and Elias cocked his head. “What? What’s on your mind? Henrik is gone. You can speak plainly.”

Agnarr leaned back in his chair and rubbed his hands together contemplatively. He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. If he could trust anyone with this, it was Elias. “Do you . . .do you ever, um, dream about Thea?”

A slow grin snaked its way across his friend’s face. “Ah.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “Yes, yes I do. Father says it’s normal, you know. Nothing that needs to be brought to the doctor or the Bishop. If that’s what’s troubling you.”

“I just – “ Agnarr sighed. “I keep dreaming about a girl. And it never feels very respectful.”

“It’s not like you’re acting on it, Ag,” Elias said. “I hope I’m not overstepping, but Father told me some of the things he’s mentioned to you. Lady Wollen as well. About not coercing the women of Arendelle. But really, you’re the last person I can imagine ever abusing his power to do that sort of thing.” He shrugged. “And as for, you know, dreams – we don’t control them. I mean, I would _never_ tell Thea about them. _That_ would be disrespectful.”

“I suppose.”

“Besides, Agnarr, I think most of those women would be thrilled even if you did tell them. They want to be Queen.”

“Not this girl. Woman.” He shifted uneasily in this seat. “I mean, I don’t think so.”

“Oh?” Elias raised an eyebrow. He drummed his fingers against the table. “Well, that would make her quite unique if she isn’t swayed by a title.” He spoke lightly. “I think if you’re dreaming about one girl all the time, that’s a clear indication of something. Not all of it bad or deviant.”

“It doesn’t make me Henrik?” Agnarr joked. Elias laughed.

“Exactly. And you couldn’t be Henrik. They like his money and he doesn’t mind, he can spread it around. You can’t exactly go handing out titles to every woman who shows interest in you. But, Agnarr, just because you’re thinking or dreaming these things . . . I think about Thea all the time. All the time. And I don’t know if women think about us like we think about them, but if she does think about me like that – it’s fine.”

Agnarr laughed. “Yes, I’m sure you’d be fine with it.”

“Not just because of that.” Elias tossed a pawn at his chest and it bounced to the floor. “What I mean is that it doesn’t diminish anything else I feel for Thea. Even without doing, you know, what Henrik gets up to-“ Elias’ cheeks were red now. “And even if – when – we do that – I still have strong feelings for her. I enjoy her company more than anyone else’s. I like to talk with her. Spend time with her. Desiring a physical relationship doesn’t sully that, I don’t think.”

“I suppose you’re right.”

“Of course I’m right.” Elias grinned. “Besides, we’re getting older and you’re not the only man in the kingdom who needs to get married. But, seriously, Ag. Don’t beat yourself up about it.”

“Alright, alright.” He waved a hand. “I won’t.”

“But Agnarr.” He looked up at Elias’ uncharacteristically serious tone. “We are getting older. Henrik can gad about forever with a string of women. But you’re the king and Arendelle’s line of succession isn’t the most secure.”

“I know I need to marry, Elias.” He sighed and rubbed his forehead. “Your father and Lady Wollen rarely let me forget.”

“I know that you know that. My point is that if your interest is truly fixed on one woman, you’re going to need to do something about it. You’ll need to make a decision before it’s made for you.”

* * * * *

“I love you,” Iduna whispered before leaning down to lace her fingers through his hair. The kiss she placed upon his mouth was soft and warm as she molded herself to his response. Agnarr had the fabric of her dress bunched in his fists where he held her waist. As she shifted her weight, never breaking her hold on him, he dropped his hands and brought them under the hem, sliding them up her calves and along her supple thighs until they were no longer separating him from her. He brought an arm around her and gently rolled her to his side with a quiet whine of disappointment as the kiss broke.

“Iduna,” he breathed. “I have loved you for years.” He pressed his lips against her neck and could feel her pulse beating wildly against them. She whimpered and he pulled back. “So much.”

“So love me,” she murmured into his ear, catching the lobe gently between her teeth as he gasped. He covered her body with his and she was soft in all the places he was not. The heat between them pooled as he pressed against her and she arched up to capture his mouth once more.

Agnarr did his best with every caress, every kiss, every movement he made in response to her encouraging moans to express what he had never been able to with his words. How much he cherished her, the depth of his desire, his want that burned within him like a flame. Their friendship was one of the highlights of his life, but he wanted more. He wanted her with him, next to him, under him and open. 

Although he knew his attempts were halting and artless, though he was painfully aware of his own inexperience, she didn’t seem to mind. She responded in kind as her hesitancy melted away and they moved as one. In the end, his awkward efforts were enough and they lay entwined, breathing heavily in the aftermath of their shared union. The air was cool against his exposed skin and he shivered as she sat up and a chill settled where she had been. He reached a hand out, but only grasped air.

“Iduna?”

“I love you, Agnarr.” The mourning in her voice gave him pause. He tried to get up, to see her, vaguely aware that she was dressing, but was unable to move past the heavy pressure of his chest. As though an invisible weight was pinning him to the bed.

“Iduna?” He struggled, unable to move his head. It was as though a curtain of India ink was spilling from the ceiling. “Are you coming back?”

“No, I have to go.”

“Go? To Fiske’s?”

“I have to leave.”

“What?”

“I’m leaving Arendelle.” 

“What!?” He tore himself up from the sheets, but his bedchamber was empty. “Iduna?” He called, pulling his clothes on and staggering out into the hall. 

“Ah, Your Majesty.” Lady Wollen and Captain Calder bowed their heads.

“Did Iduna pass by?” He asked desperately, trying to fasten the last of his coat buttons.

“Iduna? Well, she must be on her way to the docks by now,” Captain Calder said.

“We congratulated her, of course, Your Majesty. Such a shame to lose her talents to Belgium.”

“B-Belgium?” He squinted at them.

“And she passed along her congratulations to you, Your Majesty.”

“What?” He looked between the pair. “What do you mean?”

“On your impending nuptials. Arranged through the Council by your request.”

“My what?!”

“To Duchess Alexsandra.”

* * * * *

This time he woke hurling his pillow across the room and nearly rolled out of the bed and crashed to the floor before he caught himself.

“Goddammit, Elias,” he muttered, slapping his face a few times to fully rouse himself and banish the dream from his mind. But even in his aggravation, Agnarr knew he couldn’t blame his friend. Where the dreams had come once a week, they were now coming nightly. And Elias wasn’t the one who had explicitly given a diplomat permission to ask Iduna out to dinner then utterly failed to ask why she hadn’t accepted the invitation.

He sighed and flopped back against the mattress, knowing full well that sleep would not be forthcoming. It felt like his future was already upon him and he was as adrift in tides of fortune as a rudderless boat. He clutched the sheets under him, still damp with his sweat. This was ridiculous. He wasn’t a damn child any longer, being thrust into a position he was utterly unprepared to assume. He wasn’t an adolescent who was too young and inexperienced to control himself.

Agnarr rubbed his face and climbed out of the bed. No sense in wasting time that could be spent working. Perhaps, then, he wouldn’t feel so guilty about taking the night off and going out with his friends to wish farewell to Henrik. He washed and dressed and headed towards the kitchen, the hint of dawn only just appearing through the windows. It would be a long day and, most likely, a late night. Coffee was in order.


	2. Iduna

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Fericita's fault. All of it. Can't emphasize that enough. I am blameless. Also, this smut stuff takes FOREVER to write. So thank you Fericita for your encouragement and being an awesome beta reader and also helping me parse out which sections belonged in which and why fears Iduna had that would mess her up the most when mingled with having dirty dreams about her Teenage Human Disaster King.

He found her while she tended to the plants in her medicinal garden.

It was unusual for Agnarr not to wave or call a greeting as he approached. She barely heard his footsteps on the soil before he was standing next to her, positioned neatly between her and the sun. He reached down to help her to her feet, took the spade from her hand and offered her his arm.

“What-“

“Take a walk with me.” He smiled, eyes as warm as the sunlight flooding over his shoulder. He gently wound her arm into his and began to lead her into the castle. She glanced around the courtyard, but it was devoid of the gamut of servants and soldiers who usually whisked about on official business. There was no one to see her walking arm-in-arm with the king.

“Your Majesty, I-“

“Do you know what I like?” He ran the soft pad of his thumb over her knuckles. She shivered. “I like it when you call me by my name.”

“Agnarr.” She said hoarsely. 

“Iduna.” He smiled and squeezed her hand. She swallowed hard, unable to tear her gaze from his. Drawn against him, she was once again aware of how tall he had grown since their youth. But as he walked with her, down the empty halls of his castle, it nonetheless reminded her of their walks in the woods together when she had first come to Arendelle. The last time they had been alone, truly alone, without friends or an audience or other prying eyes.

He stopped in front of his bed chamber, the door slightly ajar. His eyebrows quirked.

“I would like to kiss you.”

“Excuse me?” Her breath caught in her chest. He reached to lightly run his fingers over her lips. They tingled at his gentle touch.

“I would like to kiss you, is that alright?” She managed to nod dumbly before he bent to take her mouth in his. She inhaled sharply, breathing in his cologne as her eyes closed of their own accord and she was lost in the sensation of his warmth. She could feel herself rising up onto her toes as he slid one arm around the small of her back and pressed the other against her cheek. Iduna brought her arms around his broad chest and anchored her hands on his shoulders. 

He broke the kiss, but kept his hands where they were as they gasped against one another. He rested his forehead against hers and when she glanced up, his eyes were still closed.

“Come to bed with me?” He breathed. Iduna felt rooted to the spot, her fingers curled tightly into the thick fabric of his uniform. “Do you want to?”

How often had she thought of this? She had longed for him ever since she had saved him and found herself in exile in his homeland. And growing older, moving to Arendelle, watching him entertain those empty-headed prospects from other foreign lands had only thrown her desire for him into sharp relief.

“Yes.” She managed to say before pressing her mouth against his. She felt the shape of his smile against her as he effortlessly took her into his arms and into his bed chamber. He moved her as though she weighed nothing until she felt the cool wood of the polished bed frame against the back of her dress. Agnarr broke the kiss, leaving her to draw a long, trembling breath as he stripped off his shirt.

Spirits, but he had filled out nicely. 

She kept her eyes on his broad chest and shoulders, now bare before her, as she began to undo the hooks on her dress. He stepped forward with a warm smile and took her hands in his. 

“Allow me,” his voice was dry as he deftly began to undress her. In return, she fumbled with the buttons on his trousers.

“You’re so beautiful,” he murmured against the pulse point of her neck as he laid her down against the linen sheets. He set the searing brand of his mouth against her chilled skin, moving lower until his head was firmly between her thighs and she could only clench his hair in her fists and try to remember to breathe and finally shudder against him as she finished. 

Then he was moving over her, all heat and passion and she loved him, she loved him, she loved him so much that she thought that her heart could burst. He was attentive, asking how she was. If she liked it. Responding to her moans and sighs and silences and adjusting his actions accordingly. It was remarkable how effortlessly she could translate everything she had ever hoped to convey into the act of loving him. 

He made it easy.

And when they were through, he carelessly tossed the blankets over them and pulled her close.

“Thank you.” He smiled, caressing her cheek. She turned and kissed the palm of his hand and opened her mouth to confess the unbridled affection she had felt for him since they were young, since before he could even recall, but he continued. “You’ve always been so good to me. So reliable. Your advice on how to woo women has been so helpful. I knew I could count on you to help me learn to properly pleasure a bride and sire an heir.”

He kissed her forehead. “Thank you for letting me practice.”

* * * * *

Iduna’s eyes flew open. She could feel her heart pounding against her chest, but aside from that and her white-knuckled grip on her pillow, she was certain that she was just as still as she had been when she fell asleep. Sure enough, Greet and Maddie were snoring softly.

And, sure enough, the closeness she longed for with Agnarr and his directness in seeking out her company was only to be found in her dreams. How long had it been since they had even touched? True, he had held her during their first and only dance, but that had been for a public spectacle. It didn’t matter that she had felt the ghost of his hands upon her the rest of the night. That lying in her bed that night she could feel the weight of his grip against her waist. There might have been a dizzying headiness to their dance, it might have felt like the rest of the crowd had vanished amid their spinning, but it had hardly been intimate.

She was finding it hard to steady her breathing from the ragged breaths that Agnarr had elicited from her in her dream state. Loving him like that had felt so right. And she _had_ loved him for so, so long and it hadn’t even been fair when she watched him twirling with those wealthy women who knew nothing about him beyond a title. What did they know? Of his concerns, his kindness, his generosity?

Iduna chewed on her lip and rubbed her face with both hands. It hadn’t always been like this. She had dreamt of him for years, even before moving into Fiske’s back when she was still at the orphanage. The thought of his kind smile and gentle attention had kept her warm many nights. But in the past year, her damned subconscious had betrayed her. Ever since he had started having a veritable parade of eligible noble women coming through Arendelle to try and court his title. 

She sighed and turned to her side, trying to turn her thoughts to falling from a cliff face or, once again, working without rest through an outbreak. Maybe reminiscing about her first night at the orphanage. Anything that wouldn’t be nearly as devastating as Agnarr using her to practice seducing a suitable bride.

* * * * *

“I know what you did for me,” he murmured as he took her bare shoulder in his mouth. She was stretched comfortably beneath him, eyes closed as she traced the muscular ridges of his abdomen.

“Hm?” He shifted his weight so he was at her side and she could feel his gaze upon her. She opened her eyes to find him resting his cheek in one hand as he trailed the other from her neck to navel. His touch left her restless. He smiled. “What did I do?”

“You saved my life. In the forest.” She froze and he moved so he was over her once more, bathing her in his heat. “I never thanked you properly,” he said softly before pressing his lips against the bottom of her jaw. “For saving me.” He kissed her forehead. “Did you think I could forget that?” He brushed the hair from her eyes. “Forget you?”

“I-“

“I could never forget you,” he said fervently as he ran a hand from her breast to her waist. She arched into him with a soft moan. “Iduna,” he breathed as she squirmed below him. “I remember it. The sheep.” He moved against her. “The wind spirit.” She moved with him. “The battle.” They moved as one. “I remember everything.”

“Do you?” She panted, raking her fingers through his hair and pulling him to her.

“Thank you,” he managed to gasp before she captured his mouth with a ferocity she hadn’t been aware she possessed. He knew her. Who she was. What she had done. He knew her completely. 

Iduna gave herself over to Agnarr’s frantic display of gratitude. Gasping against him and trying to gain purchase on his sweat-slicked skin as she lost herself in the wild rhythm of his body against hers. They shuddered against one another, collapsing against the sheets as he moaned her name.

He caressed her cheek as they lay shoulder to shoulder, his cheeks flushed from his exertion. “You took care of me. Now I’ll take care of you.” He leaned forward and kissed her again. 

“Oh?” She laughed as he broke the kiss. She could get used to being taken care of like this. “How so?”

“Marriage, of course,” he sighed and rolled on to his back, hands behind his head. She grinned so broadly that it hurt. “I can make you a match that’s second to none.” And just as fast, her smile was gone.

“What?”

“I have too much respect for you to make you my mistress.” He frowned. “We’re friends. It would never do. But I can at least ensure that you’re married to a good man, a kind one – a wealthy one. Someone who can take care of you.”

“But-“ She tried to muster any semblance of coherence. “But why did – you just – “

“Oh.” He blushed. “Well, you know I’m fond – very fond - of you. I wanted you to know how I feel. But I’m the king. Duty over desire. But at least I can do this for you. Make a match. Hubert is a good man. And you already know him. And he wouldn’t mind about this. I already told him you weren’t courting anyone.

* * * * *

Her fists were clenched so tightly as Iduna woke that they ached. This was ridiculous. The damn dreams weren’t even making sense anymore and they are coming more often. She wasn’t some frightened, lovesick child anymore who was still casting about for any sense of belonging in a foreign land. She had friends. She had a job. Hell, she even had potential suitors who showed up to the shop without buying anything and drove Mr. Visser mad. She shook her head to clear her thoughts.

Agnarr didn’t remember – couldn’t. Not if she wanted to remain safe. She sat up and hugged her knees to her chest. She wasn’t even certain what she wanted any longer. No matter how much she tried to dismiss her feelings for Agnarr as a childish fantasy, she still hadn’t been able to bring herself to spend time with any of the young men who had expressed interest in her. She half-hoped he would just hurry up and pick one of the wealthy women who weren’t interested in knowing anything more than his title. Maybe then she could give up on him.

Agnarr was her friend. But more importantly, he was the King of Arendelle. And she had lived there long enough, listened to enough people, and had enough off-hand comments made to her apropos to nothing, to understand that kings did not simply marry shop girls.

* * * * *

“With your permission, Iduna, I would like to pay formal court to you.” He held her hand against his heart so she could feel its steady beat. His eyes were warm and hopeful. There was birdsong in the background. He had asked her on a walk in one of her favorite parts of the woods and surprised her by showing up with a picnic lunch. Now, they were laying side-by-side on a blanket, their boots and shoes laying in the grass near his discarded jacket. She drew herself up on her elbow, slowly shaking her head.

“But the Council-“

“Has already approved.” He smiled, propped himself up, and caressed her cheek. “I told them my decision and have their full backing to ask you.” He gently placed a finger against her lips as she opened her mouth to protest. “Iduna, this is my decision. No one cares where you’re from. In Arendelle, nobility is judged by a person’s conduct, not their bloodline.” He brought his forehead to rest against hers. “Please, say you’ll be mine.”

“Of course,” she said. He beamed and she smiled broadly before squeaking in surprise as he moved to press his mouth against hers in a passionate kiss. She toppled over backwards, grabbing the front of his shirt and popping a button as she pulled him on top of her.

“I’m so sorry!” He gasped as he tried to move away from her, but she held fast and managed to hook her leg around his knee.

“Don’t be.” She searched his face as he gazed at her before drawing him back down against her. She could feel him responding as their mouths met. He was warm and solid and felt so good against her and she had thought about this for far too long. She brought her hands along his sides, reaching down until she managed to find his fly buttons and began undoing them. He groaned into her mouth and rolled against her, breaking the kiss to gently graze her earlobe with his teeth as she shuddered. 

“Are you certain?” He asked, pushing his hair back from his face. “You want this?”

“Yes.”

“I can wait.” In response, she stood before him and undid her dress fasteners, allowing the material to slide to where it bunched at her waist. He was staring up at her the way the saints in the paintings of the castle galleries started up at God. She pushed the material over her hips so it fell to the ground. Even in just her chemise, she felt impossibly hot in the mid-day sun.

“I don’t want to.”

His face flushed as he rose unsteadily, his pants already hanging off of his hips. Agnarr worked his buttons self-consciously, his blush reaching his ears in such an endearing way that Iduna couldn’t help but smile. He managed to kick off his trousers and they stood for a few moments, letting their gazes wander over one another’s nearly nude forms. He took a hesitant step forward and placed his hand on her cheek.

“I love you.” 

His words felt as though they lit a sun inside her and she wrapped her arms around him, letting him capture her mouth once more and lower her to the blanket. The silk of his undergarment was cool and smooth against her legs and the linen of her chemise tickled her as Agnarr gently pushed it over her chest and helped her take it off.

His hands roamed her body as he kissed her neck, her ear, her mouth. She felt the swell of his biceps and the hard planes of his chest under her roving palms. She pressed her mouth to his collarbone and tasted the salt of his sweat as he moved. His joining with her giving her a sense of completeness she hadn’t anticipated, the physical proof of his love and affection overwhelming her so quickly and intensely that she still hadn’t entirely recovered when he was done.

They lay next to one another, spent and panting, her ear pressed against the hammering beat of his heart. A happy laugh rumbled up from his chest and she tilted her face to take in his smile. He rubbed her back.

“I love you, Iduna.” He said, sighing contentedly and closing his eyes. “And now I know everything about you.” Her breath caught in her throat at his words. A tendril of guilt so intense that it was painful coiled itself through her gut.

“Agnarr.” She pulled away from him, the air cool against her skin, and bit her lip. She couldn’t keep lying to him. Not if they were going to be together like this. Not if this might end in marriage and a family.

“Hmm?” She looked down at him. His eyes were still closed and he was resting comfortably against the blanket. She traced a finger over his taut stomach.

“Agnarr, do you remember the day you escaped the forest?”

“Mmhmm.” He opened his eyes and looked at her curiously. “How could I forget?”

“There – there was a voice. You’ve mentioned.”

“Yes,” he said cautiously.

“Agnarr, that was my voice.” Her voice faltered as he sat up, staring at her. “I saved you that day.” He was slowly shaking his head, as though he couldn’t believe what she was saying. “I’m Northuldra.”

“No. No, there’s no possible way. They were all trapped in the mist, Iduna. I don’t know what you’re playing at, but it’s not amusing.”

“I sang and summoned the Wind Spirit, Agnarr. It was always fond of me. And it carried you and I to safety before the mist came down. It brought us to a wagon. But then I was trapped here and-“

“Your people murdered my father!” He bellowed. She cowered, suddenly aware of the vulnerability of her nakedness in a way that she hadn’t been. She reached out and touched his wrist but he slapped her hand away as he stood.

“Agnarr,” she pleaded. “I didn’t-“

“You’ve lied to me for all these years?” His face was purple with rage and his fists were clenched. “How could you?” He gathered his clothing as she covered herself in the blanket.

“Please, I-“

“Shut up!” He hissed, pointing an accusatory finger at her. His chest was heaving. The naked hatred and loathing that twisted his face caused her to flinch. She could feel the sting of tears. “Just shut up. No more lying.” He dropped his hand, looked away, and then looked back at her. “You have until tomorrow. By tomorrow evening, you will be on a ship sailing elsewhere. If you’re still in Arendelle in two day’s time – I’ll throw you in the dungeon. And I’ll have you tried for treason. One way or the other, you’re dead to me.”

* * * * *

“What do you mean you’re not coming to Henrik’s farewell?” Greet eyed her as though she had gone mad. “Of course you’re coming. You’ve been looking forward to this.”

“I’m just . . .I’m not in a celebratory mood,” Iduna said, hugging herself tightly.

“It’s not really a celebration, Iddy.” Maddie studied her with concern.

“You know what I mean.” She waved a hand. “Drinking. Singing. Dancing. It’s just – I’m just – I don’t want to go.” Maddie and Greet exchanged a look.

“Iduna,” Greet spoke softly but firmly. “I really need you to hear me when I say that you’re going. Henrik is going to be upset if you’re not there. And when Henrik gets upset, he gets mopey. And when he gets mopey, he drinks too much to be of any use to me in bed.”

“Oh God, Greet.” Maddie sighed and furiously rubbed her temples. “Iddy, this really will be the last time any of us see Henrik for some time. And he will miss you. And not just because of your tonics or whatever it is you sell him. You’ve known him as long as you’ve known any of us – longer, even.”

“You don’t have to stay the whole night if you don’t want to,” Greet said. “Just come for two or three drinks and then you can come straight home. You won’t even have to pay! You know that Henrik, Elias and Agnarr are going to insist on covering us.”

“It’s not the money-“

“You’re coming, Iddy.” Greet glared at her. “And that’s final. Maddie, back me up on this.”

Maddie gave her a pained look. “You really should. For Henrik. And who knows when we’ll all be together again?” Iduna drew a deep breath and looked away. “If it helps, I promise I’ll leave whenever you’re ready. We can walk back here together.”

“Fine. One or two drinks.” 

Maybe a drink or two would grant her a dreamless sleep. She needed it.


End file.
